I have a colleague who is quite well meaning and apparently Catholic in a kind of endearing 14th century sort of way.
She always asks how Samson is doing and now asks about Jane as well. One day as we were leaving work she asked when Jane would be baptized. As the godparents (Vicki's brother, Ben, and his wife, Karen) are in Texas and soon to be headed to Colorado, we figured May was probably a good target.
When I mentioned this to my colleague, she asked if Vicki and I had considered having a private baptism in our house. At first, I was totally clueless as to what she was intimating. So I patiently re-explained that Ben and Karen probably wouldn't be back east until late spring.
At which point, again in a very nice way --- sort of like if Mary Kay had worked for Torquemada --- she put forth the private/home baptism option.
Finally I caught on and politely informed her that God forbid anything should happen to Jane, I would expect that her lack of baptism wouldn't consign her to some weird Dantean eternity in the company of Homer and pals.
What I didn't say (again, this person is very nice and I'm sure genuinely concerned about all our souls) was that a heaven that's only for baptized Catholics --- or all Christians for that matter --- seems kind of pointless. No sense in burdening her with my heresy.
Also, I'm totally leaving a ham, bacon, meatloaf, veal, and roast beef sandwich on her desk when Lent starts. I'll tell her it's from Jane...
2 comments:
Is your co-worker related to a Sister Hildegaard from Norristown, PA? Because she was my 4th grade teacher and, along with analyzing in detail each episode of The Rookies, she instilled in us the importance of early baptism and told us how to perform it on a pagan baby...should the need arise (like slacker parents).
dont forget the chicken and roast pork, along with the matza ball soup as a chaser
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