You can build it (in theory). We can help (allegedly).

Don't believe the hype, I've rarely found the guys at Home Depot to be particularly helpful. In fact, it's not easy to find them at all. So it goes.

I hit the Depot the other day to get some PVC pipe to make Samson a didgeridoo for Christmas. This summer at the farmers' market, there was a guy there playing a didgeridoo [or didge, to the cognoscenti], and Sam was absolutely fascinated by it.

Unfortunately, the guy never showed up again, but every time we go to the market poor Samson expects to see him.

In any event, since then he has been making didges out of paper towel rolls. He scrunches up his face and does his best to imitate the rather singular sound of the didgeridoo. You've probably heard one without realizing it, but click here for some samples.

You can imagine, of course, the reaction I got from the guy in the plumbing department when I asked him to cut me 3 feet of PVC for a didgeridoo. He protested he couldn't cut to measure. No problem, I said, just make it approximate.

He protested that he had to sell me all 10 feet. No problem, I said, I'll just stick the shorter piece in the cart and carry the rest to the register.

And then he protested that they sold stand-alone pieces of 2 feet in length, and wouldn't I rather have that instead.

Samson, from the cart ventured his opinion/confusion: "The man is helping us?"

I assured Samson that the man was and hoped the guy would just cut the damn pipe and let us get out of his aisle.

Surly orange-aproned guy aside, we got all our supplies and headed home.

Last night, after sanding and priming the pipe, I painted it. In truth, it looks less like primitive art and more like art therapy for head wound survivors, but I tried.

I have to make the beeswax mouthpiece tonight, and then it's ready to wrap for Christmas. [Yes I took him with me to get the materials, and yes he has some vague sense he's getting a didge, but I'm banking on the intervening weeks and continued train requests to push this gift to the back of his mind.]

Nothing says Christmas morning at our house like the low drone of a stone-age instrument made out of plumbing pipe.